My first born left me a few days ago for a Spring Break trip with a group from school. I'm not sure what normal moms think about when their kids leave to do something like that, but every time my son leaves the house to catch the bus I think about Jaycee Dugard so...you can imagine.
My parting words to her were something like, "Listen, I want you to have a blast and I don't need you to miss me or think about me. Just, please, send me a text once a day or something to let me know you haven't been abducted by aliens. Or worse, the Real Housewives of Orange County." Do you know what she said? "I'll try, Mom." I'll TRY?! Next time you beg me to bring the lunch you left on the counter I'm going to remember this. It's day four, I've heard from her twice. Fine, baby girl. Is this how you wanna play it? Just for that we are taking Drew to see Hunger Games WITHOUT YOU.
In fact, we DID take Drew to see Hunger Games without her and as we arrived early and waited for the movie to start he looked over at me and said, "No offense, but this would be way more fun if Samantha were here." I couldn't disagree, but I feigned a bruised ego. "I'm sorry," Drew continued, "it's just that if she were here I would be saying something stupid and she would be laughing at it anyway." His comment helped me recall a small moment I observed last week as we were headed in to church. I was stuck a few paces behind them as we made our way into the front doors and I glanced up to see the two of them walking side by side, cracking up over a joke I wasn't a part of. It made me happy - I've given many rousing speeches about their need to be loving and supportive of each other, and it did my heart good to witness those prayers being granted.
At church again today, as I gathered my things at the end of class I went to my normal meeting spot for Drew. After I corralled him away from friends to join my pace we headed for the area where Samantha is usually waiting. As we approached we found an empty room and I commented, "Oh. I came here to get Samantha but I forgot, she's not here." Drew confessed that he had done the same thing only minutes ago, and the two of us walked out quietly.
It's not these few days that rattles me because truly, I want her to have fun and be happy and fine and not think about home. (Too much.) The problem is that I know this is just preparation for the day she will truly LEAVE. When it happens, I will deal with it. Drew will deal with it. Cory will barely notice. We will be okay.
But man, we (will) miss her.