On Tuesday I had four cupcakes for lunch. But I thought Vern was on Weight Watchers. I am. Incidentally, four cupcakes equals 36 points, and I am only supposed to consume 29 in a day. Luckily WW accounts for situations like this and gives us 49 extra points each week to allow for things like PMS. But I thought Vern didn't have a uterus and couldn't get PMS. It's called phantom PMS - it's very rare but affects approximately 1 in every 5,792 hysterectomies. I think she's making this up. I might be making this up. White lies are a side effect of phantom PMS.
At any rate, I was sorta hoping I could keep this cupcake thing on the down low so that people could go on thinking I'm awesome for losing the equivalent of about three newborns so far. Well, two newborns if you descend from the Gardner line in my family, maybe five newborns if they are premature. Is she fishing for presents? I'm registered at Target. THE POINT IS, when I shared the video of my son dancing like Urkel after one too many pixie sticks I received multiple inquiries about the cupcakes? muffins? that were featured in the background. Here's what I have to say about that; if you guys can look past the glasses, the dancing, and the red basketball shorts hiked up so high they got altitude sickness to see the food on the counter then YOU ARE MY PEOPLE. For the record, they were indeed cupcakes, but not just any cupcakes. These were sort of an experiment on my part and may I say, they turned out delicious. I'm calling them Orange Dreamsicle Cupcakes with Chocolate Chip Cheesecake filling. If you like the combination of orange and chocolate you will love them, and I assume you will want the recipe. So. Let's get to it, shall we?
Yellow cake mix (Are you disappointed that this isn't from scratch? Too bad so sad. I can only be so amazing.)
Red food coloring
2 tsp orange extract
*Mix according to box directions. Add a few drops of red food coloring to give it that nice, citrus-y tint. Add extract. Spoon into cupcake liners.
THE FILLING8 ozs softened cream cheese
1/3 cup sugar
dash of salt
1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
* Mix cream cheese, sugar, egg and salt until smooth then add chocolate chips. Spoon about a tablespoon onto unbaked cupcakes. Bake according to box directions, about 20-25 minutes.
ORANGE BUTTERCREAM FROSTING1/4 cup softened butter
1/4 cup margarine
1/2 cup shortening
4 cups powdered sugar
2 tsp. orange extract
zest of one orange
*Mix ingredients and add milk until you reach your desired consistency.
*Frost cooled cupcakes and refrigerate. Serve cold.
Here's what it looks like when you cut one in half - the filling sort of sinks to the bottom while baking and you get a nice, dense taste of chocolatey goodness surrounded by the smooth buttercream and fluffy cake.
And that's why I ate four.