I had so much fun with the What I Know For Sure post that I have decided to make it a regular feature, complete with useful quotes from Oprah, and utterly pointless knowledge from me. So here it is: Volume II
Happiness is never something you get from other people. The happiness you feel is in direct proportion to the love you give.
1. Mouthwash is useless as a hand soap
2. I have enough turtleneck sweaters
3. Barbra Streisand is not nearly as cool as she thinks she is
4. I am happier when everything is clean and in order
5. I’m not a neat freak
6. These two worlds collide on a regular basis drawing me closer and closer to the precipice of insanity
7. A $20 gift certificate to Nordstrom is about as useful as winning a parking voucher for the Super Bowl
8. Sending your kid out the door wearing camouflage shorts, American flag crocs, and the same shirt he has worn for three days in a row is a recipe for a low parenting moment
9. So is hearing your 2-year-old repeat the expletive they just heard you say after your water pipe burst the day after you installed brand new hardwood floors
10. Commercials that speak in text messages are only clever the first time around. I mean it. It’s not funny anymore.