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Friday, August 13, 2010

Tidbits From Dix - 2010 Installment

One of the things I love about my mom is that she is savvy and she keeps up with the times.  She's not the kind who shrinks from a challenge, but rather hikes up her big girl panties, squares her shoulders and says, "I pity the fool."  Not really.  It's my DAD who says, "I pity the fool", but only when watching The A Team reruns.  (You probably think I'm kidding.) ((I'm not.))  Another thing I love about my mom is that she entered my ugly photo contest, but only on the condition that I would post a good picture of her after she won.  Bad news:  Sorry, Mom. You weren't the ugliest.  Good news:  MOM!  YOU WEREN'T THE UGLIEST!  It seems only fair that I would post a good picture of her anyway, you know, to keep myself in the will and everything.  Check it:



Don't let the corsage fool you - this lady is one cool chick.  It's my mother who keeps us all apprised of family happenings by sending multiple emails a week, sustaining a blog, and maintaining her facebook account.  Just last week I discovered an old boyfriend of my sister's on facebook, so natually I had to call her and tell her to look him up - which she did, and then called me back moments later to say, "Okay, so MOM is on his friend's list!"  Classic.

My dad's name is Dix and he, on the other hand, avoids most computer related tasks.  When my parents start their day my mom goes in the office to check email while my Dad makes breakfast.  They have a system.  It's called, "Holy crap, now that we're retired you are always here.  And I am always here.  And once upon a time we promised eternity to each other, and at the time I don't think either one of us realized how long that was, so if we're going to keep that promise you should probably start making me breakfast."  I know this because Cory has Fridays off, and at first he was like, "So...what's for lunch?"  And I was like, "Who are you?  And what have you done with that guy who leaves for the day?"  Anyway.  The point is we don't "hear" as much from my Dad.  But every once in a while he chimes in to the family email fray and writes something that cracks me up.  For example, my mom recently shot us a message to update us on the cost to replace my Dad's pacemaker (over 50K, in case you were wondering).  A few of us have responded back and forth but I woke up this morning to my Dad's annual email contribution regarding the case of the pacemaker:
I went online and found I could have had the same surgery in India for $5400 and they guaranteed world class quality of the pacemaker...and as a matter of fact...if I buy one today they will send me two for the price of one and include a vegetable chopper and two Shamwows FREE. (I'm holding out to see if they will throw in the boiled egg slicer.) ~Dad
I've already put in my bid for the extra Shamwow.  Stay tuned - the 2009 installment is coming shortly.

8 comments:

Susie J. said...

Because I just can't resist...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOFJ8JFJZYo

Vern said...

Susie J - that was awesome

Lorie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lorie said...

I'll tell you this.... it takes two amazing/weird/funny/sweet/wonderful people to create all that we love about our "Vern"!!!!!

Stefani said...

thanks for making my day

Rachey said...

Grandma is so awesome, I always brag to people about how "with it" she is. And that is a great picture of her.

Somehow I missed out on this funny e-mail exchanged, so thanks for sharing it here!

ganelle said...

All I'm thinking, is WHERE is MY nice picture??? There was no redemption for me, and I WON that blasted contest! I want vindication!!!

*katie said...

I love your parents:)