Friday, March 12, 2010

No Longer Anonymous

When I was in high school there were several stoners who asked me to marry them. “Marry me,” one asked with a doped up smile as we walked one of the many paths across campus. “Very funny,” I replied. Another one proposed to me in my yearbook. “Will you marry me?” he scribbled across the inside cover, the words laced with traces of LSD. It was all very romantic, my stoner proposals, but I never quite knew how to take them. Even though the invitations were in jest, one still confessed to me that I was the “kind of girl a guy like him would want to marry someday.” In other words, right now I’d kind of like to have fun and be irresponsible and make stupid choices, but if I ever decided to get serious about a real relationship you’re the kind of chick I’d be looking for. (P.S. chick = [chik] noun – 1. a girl who had enough fashion sense to wear blue mascara and striped leg warmers on the same day, only to feel inferior if wearing anything less than Guess jeans.) So yeah, the only people who had a thing for me in high school were the ones who hid their weed under their mattresses.

These memories have been recurring to me over the last few weeks because it seems I have moved on to the perverts. I am a big fan of leaving on the Anonymous option for comments on the blog because every once in a while my sister tries to log on, and I want her to have the freedom of speech without the commitment of a Google account. But for whatever reason I have become a magnet lately for inappropriate links to be posted as an anonymous commenter, and I refuse to be any kind of platform for skanky people to get more traffic. So, just like I turned down my stoner proposals I am shutting off my anonymous comments. Sorry Sooz- the pervs made me do it.

13 comments:

Emily said...

I do enjoy your blog (you are hilarious!) and I understand about the comments. Anonymous comments creep me out. I have to say that I got a huge thrill to see you comment on my blog today. Usually it's just Grandma or Aunties or people who live within a 1 mile radius of me. It's like getting a celebrity's autograph!

Vern said...

Wow, Emily. Celebrity? Dare I say you should get out more? :)

Rachey said...

Ha ha, that is so funny. I'm a bit curious about these pervy links;)

Mr. Darcy said...

Just for the record at least you are getting comments, which is more than I can say for my blog. Don't worry this isn't a plug to get comments just acknowledgment that sometimes something is better than nothing. Although nothing can be a relief from too much. I know this is vague and rambling so I'll stop.

Vanessa said...

dangnabit

ganelle said...

I'm reminded of a guy Diamond worked with who always talked about wanting to marry a Mormon - but wouldn't even CONSIDER dating one... too goody goody for much fun on a date.

Steph @ Diapers and Divinity said...

You must of been REALLY hot to look that good through all that drug-induced fog. Nice.

Bakeshow said...

I agree with Emily- Lucky to have *anyone* comment on your blog. I peed with glee the first time you commented on mine. ;)

Amy said...

That's funny, I used to get those "I don't want to date you (the mormon thing), but I would want to marry you" comments. It's a variation on "I don't want to date a virgin, but I want to marry one." Needless to say, I was usually home on a Friday night. I knew the ABC Friday night TV lineup very well.

Amy said...

I hate it when the pervs make you do stuff. Sorry about that....

PS I know Emily - she gets out plenty, maybe you should realize you ARE sorta celebretus. :)

Kerri said...

That totally sucks that someone is expressing their perving on such a great and funny blog. Sorry that happened to you.

Paige said...

Oh, the blue mascara!

Paige said...

Oh, the blue mascara!