Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Quandary Outside The Caribbean

Last Friday I drove my friends, Ganelle and Ginger and their families, to the airport. No biggie, except that it was snowing that morning and it just so happened that the purpose of said trip was so my friends could start their journey to a week long cruise in the Caribbean (KU-RIBBY-UN? CARE-A-BEE-IN? I’m still not sure). Ganelle showed up in flip flops as the snowflakes fluttered outside and when I looked at her quizzically she yelled, “I REFUSE TO WEAR LOAFERS WHEN I AM GOING TO THE BEACH!!!” Whatever. I’m used to her yelling in all caps.

At any rate, it was a little annoying to wave them off at the prospect of sunny beaches and swaying palms when I had to turn around and head back into the fray of 30 degrees, but I handled it. As they got out and headed to the gate they both threw me their full sets of keys and said, “Thanks Vern! We promise to return with chocolate!” Their cars are now parked in my driveway serving as a daily reminder that their life is better than mine.

I was okay with that because the next few days proved sunny and spring-like.  But then this morning I woke up to THIS:


So let's recap.  I am HERE:


And Ganelle is here:


I'm not bitter, just emotionally challenged.  Now, for those of you who are new to my blog you may not know about my history with Ganelle. It is somewhat extensive and doesn’t usually utilize adjectives such as “sweet” and “gentle”, but to Ganelle’s detriment she is incredibly loyal so she is still around. Nevertheless, we have played our share of jokes and pranks on each other. She puts my house up for sale when I’m out of town, I make her think her car’s been stolen and wait until she’s about to call 911 before pulling her keys out of my pocket – it’s a very healthy relationship. So after waking to the mass of snow I had to shovel this morning and having to look at Ganelle’s car parked safely near the curb as I imagined a tall, dark and handsome cabana boy delivering her diet Coke poolside, I remembered something. I have all of her keys. I HAVE ALL OF HER KEYS! This is like putting a stripper in front of Tiger Woods and saying, “Don’t Touch.”

She’s overseas. She’s not checking my blog. I have all of her keys and her car is parked in my driveway. But I’m torn. Should I use this opportunity to prove just how behaved I can be and how much she can really trust me by doing nothing? Or do I make the most of this chance and pull a doozie on her? And if so, how do you define “doozie”? Because I have to say, I’ve used up all my good ideas.

14 comments:

Vanessa said...

I am just giddy thinking of whatever it is that you're GOING to do....unfortunately I am not too creative in that department. I did short sheet all of the beds in my uncle's home once....which he then left a bag of dog business in my closet....and so on and so forth.

janabananagirl said...

You could always make a copy of her house key and save the prank for later, when she least expects it.

(A pair of elders did that to my companion and I on my mission, only we found the extra key and stole it and then "accidentally" left our keys in the car and set them up. And just when they were complacent again and left their apartment unlocked, we got them extra good. *sigh* It was glorious.)

Sherise said...

Doozie! Doozie! Actually, I like the idea of waiting until later when she's not expecting it. But if you do that, you'll have to delete this post until after you pull the mother of all pranks, so she doesn't read it.

Susie J. said...

Surely some of these could come in handy...
http://www.tensionnot.com/jokes/april_fools_jokes/great_april_fools_day_jokes_pranks_tricks

Tia Juana said...

Now that I have made my weighty decision that took most of my energy for several weeks, I will think about this and get back to you. This could be a lot of fun - for you and me.

And, you are already "in". Just let me know what email to use.

Marianne & Clayton said...

Ooh! Stencil some 90's geese across her backsplash. Replace all of her diet coke with regular (that would be my undoing). Saran wrap all their toilets, pack snow against their front door so hard that they HAVE to shovel first thing in their flip flops (dangerous, as kind neighbors might undo that one), sprinkle grass seeds in the shape of naughty words on their front lawn- spring will hilarious. I might be back with more, I really like your scenario.

Kerri said...

Put some mudflaps on their car of those....I guess they are Playboy women posed or something...because they probably wouldn't notice it for a while. I don't know if that would fit on a car. Or one of those license plate frames that says something obnoxious. Put a sandbox in the living room to "remind them" of their vacation. Buy some $1.00 or $2.00 flip flops and replace all her shoes with them. Stage the house to look like squatters have been living there. That's all that immediately comes to mind, but I'll let you know if I think of anything else.

Carly Almost Richardson said...

I am SO excited to find out what you do!!!

I wish I had good ideas.

Heather said...

This is gonna be EPIC! I'm totally excited. There is no way you are going to be responsible- so please stop all those crazy ideas now.

Jen said...

I vote for filling a room in their house - or fill their car with styrofoam packing peanuts. Or wrap everything in a room in tin foil, or Christmas paper. Everytime they need something it's like getting a present! Or just put little things in drawers here an there - a tube of preperation H in the kitchen utensil drawer....a plastic fork in the bathroom drawer, you know odd random stuff that really makes no sense - so she comes back and here and there finds something and wonders "What is THIS doing HERE?" I'm with the gotta do SOMETHING club!

the emily said...

oh the possibilities! i like jana's idea. my brother-in-law played a prank on me in college when he made a copy of our house key (story here: http://emilyssomething.blogspot.com/2008/09/question-of-week.html )...

rick and cheryl said...

Oh the possibilities...so, what did you decide? Remind me to never give you our house key. :)

rocslinger said...

You could leave little notes about the house that say something like I'm such a good friend that I could have given in to the temptation to do such and such but I didn't except for........oh never mind.
Leave her guessing.

psychological torture is so fun.

Stephanette said...

Who needs well behaved anyway?

I want to see a doozie..please?!?